Granddad passed away on Monday... I've tried to watch how it affects me...when I found out I was kinda numb. Took the day off on Tuesday to let things sink in...slept most of it and had a hard time going into work. I notice that I pullback and withdraw when I lose someone. Today I just did what I had to do and came home. But I need to know when coincidence stops and reality begins. I'm saying this because life always ends up giving me just enough to push through. Since Friday a lot has been going on...including someone you met. Sad part is it probably won't go anywhere...although it's going very well, we haven't met in person. And I'm sure that's where things will kinda stop. So part of me is undecided how to deal with this. Part of me wants to back away and let things go...maybe in my next convo with her try and find something that's a make or break for her. That way no one gets hurt, especially her. She's pretty chill and I can learn a lot from her. She's very diff from what I'm used to, relight down to morals and culture. September is definitely going to be a fucking roller coaster.. Still though...losing my grandfather is a huge blow. I still have a hard time believing I'll never hear his voice anymore or see him. It also kills me that his great grand daughter missed out on the last years. It's something she'll never be able to get back... Anyway that's sorta what the last 4 days have been like...I can only imagine the next 4....fml
Sent from my iPhone or Blackberry
No comments:
Post a Comment